Rick Pitino: Dirtbag

Am I a corpse?So Rick Pitino’s extortion trial started. He had, by all acounts, a very brief sexual encounter with some old Louisville huer up on a table at Porcini’s in Louisville back whenever the fuck it all happened, I can’t be bothered to look up the date. This much we do know though.

But Pitino the victim? Wow…

And before I go any further, Rick Pitino isn’t a sex-addict; he’s a shitbag. He banged(?) a money grubber after he’d been out golfing and drinking all day and it’s come back to bite him in the ass. He got her pregnant, he paid for her abortion and he set her up with some sugar daddy new husband that was already employed within the UofL Athletic Department. I’m not linking any of it because you can all look it up for yourselves. Rick Pitino did all those things. All for 15 fucking seconds on a tabletop. Good lord. Is Karen Sypher a sex addict? Probably not. But even if she is, focusing on her “addiction” missed the damn point about as badly as Aramis Ramirez misses a mid-90’s fastball right down the goddamn middle of the plate. In other words, if you don’t watch the Cubs, Doyel whiffs and looks like an asshole doing it.

What bothers me most in all this disgusting story isn’t Rick. Nope. Its actually his employer, the University of Louisville. Where have they been throughout this whole process? Do they have anything to say during the trial of their most public employee? Does Pitino’s boss Tom Jurich, who only wears borrowed ties, have anything to say? Nah, not really, other than the fact that UofL gave Pitino a goddamn “loyalty bonus” back in the Spring, long after his little table top fling had already occured. LOYALTY BONUS? Why wasn’t he fired?


Pitino hasn’t been fired yet because of the absurdly-named KFC Yum! Center, that’s why. Louisville, like the small minded river town that it actually is, hemmed and fucking hawed about an arena for years, finally breaking ground on the NBA-quality structure in late 2008. The only problem? The main money maker for the main tenant of the building had sex on top of a table with a locally-known whore and later paid for her abortion during the same time that anyone could’ve gone downtown and scrawled their initials in the newly-poured foundation of the $200+ million dollar riverside monument. UH OH!

So what was UofL supposed to do? Fire their coach who has a National Championship and multiple Final Fours on his CV? Would you have done that? Would you have done it even if you were staying in your old dump down on the fairgrounds? I don’t think I would have. But i damn sure wouldn’t have fired the best coach the university has ever had while I was opening a new arena that the university and the city couldn’t afford to begin with.

This dirtbag had a city by the balls at the same time some old gold digger had him by the actual balls. And no one involved was even remotely aware of it all, which is the point: No one involved in college athletics seems to really care about college athletics. They care about money and power and I guess occasionally having sex on top of restaurant tables. They break rules and when the hammer is about to drop, they move to Seattle and avoid any penalty whatsoever. They change their school’s conference affiliation at the drop of a hat all the while talking about tradition and respect.

Pitino’s still out recruiting. And he’s still employed by UofL. And they’re still a member of the Big East, a BCS conference that competes within the NCAA. And he will be for as long as he wants.

Dirtbags.

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